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Rewarding Me For Poo

September 16, 2010

Ho. Lee. Crap. You guys – I won an award! I’m still in shock that people want to read about my sex-obsessed, naked-party-loving children, let alone reward me for it…but a big, juicy ‘thanks’ to Morgan for doing just that.

This is serious business and as a recipient, there are some rules I have to follow:

1. Acknowledge the person who nominated me:
Morgan over at We just discovered each other and it’s like a shlockey romance novel from the 50’s how much I adore her. Her writing is delicious.

2. List ten things I like (I’m not gonna include my family, because they’re a given…just don’t think I forgot them a la Hillary Swank or Sean Penn):

1. Winning awards for blogging
2. Dairy Queen blizzards (strawberry sundae topping and oreo cookie)
3. Sleeping past 7:00 a.m.
4. Pinot Grigio on a hot day
5. Merlot on a cold day
6. Gardeners (cuz I kill green stuff)
7. Tina Fey (cuz she’s funny and smart and has hips)
8. Going to a Saturday matinee with my husband
9. Being in, on or near the water
10. Calling myself a writer

3. Now I have to nominate ten other bloggers. Only ten! I read so many awesome blogs every day, but here are a few faves in no particular order: Meredith is relatively new to the blogging world, but a legendary mad demon on Twitter. Her writing is simply sublime. Leanne lives by the motto, “If you can’t laugh at yourself, laugh at your kids”. ‘Nuff said. Because anyone having a bedazzled disco toilet on their home page is someone worth knowing. Queen Momma brings the funny. Sara continually amazes me with her ability to not only cope, but also thrive as a single mom in Toronto. Her mommy rants are da bomb. Like me, Paige is a newbie blogger, but she writes like a pro about all sorts of topics, like Wii drama and her so-perfect-sounding-it-makes-you-want-to-kill-her-except-she’s-so-darn-nice husband. Lisa is hilarious even when she’s despondent. Check her out and fall in love like I did. Molly chronicles her family’s attempt to wipe their debt by cutting their expenses in half while still having fun. Also, she had a family wedding officiated by Elvis. Intrigue! Allison is a bad-ass Texan and funny enough to make me do the pee laugh on a regular basis. And don’t get me started on her Tweets… #weardependswhenyoureadher. What happens when a mean girl becomes a mommy? Read Andrea’s blog to find out (hint: she reforms without leaving all the good snark behind). Don’t let the handle fool you, Sarah’s blog is full of beautiful musings on motherhood, womanhood and her Kanye West devotion. I want to be like her when I grow up. Jessica is a social media goddess with all sorts of goodies on her blog, including some dating horror stories that had me spitting water on the keyboard.

(Ok…it’s 11…sue me for loving you all too much!)

I'd like to thank Lilly, who waxes my eyebrows...and the dude at the bakery who gives me free cheese sticks...and...

33 Comments leave one →
  1. September 16, 2010 11:09 am

    Totally sneaking here on my phone at work – you are so sweet, I can’t stand it! 1. You deserve many awards & 2. OMFG me!!

  2. September 16, 2010 11:15 am

    GET OUT *pushes you to the ground; helps you back up*
    YOU ARE SO SWEET! Thanks so much for this lovely award…my first!! Love YOU. love your blog!! THANKS AGAIN!

    • September 16, 2010 12:46 pm

      *dusting myself off* no problemo, toots! I find it hard to believe you haven’t won buckets of awards…

  3. September 16, 2010 11:21 am

    Even your thank yous are funny.

  4. September 16, 2010 11:36 am

    Sorry it took me so long to comment…. I couldn’t decide which designer to wear… there is a red carpet isn’t there? No? aww crap! and I look soo good, really, trust me! 😉 Thank you so much for this honor, you are a sweetheart and you’re funny! What a catch, I have the perfect guy for you! What’s that? you’re married? aww, crap! well let me know if that doesn’t work out! 🙂

    Thank you! Really. Seriously. No joke this time! xo

    • September 16, 2010 12:48 pm

      Oh emm gee. I am installing a red carpet in my front hall, stat. Your blog is great…!

  5. September 16, 2010 12:04 pm

    thank you so much for my nomination. Just curious: Does that come with a cash prize? 🙂

  6. September 16, 2010 1:03 pm

    The last time I won an award I was 13 and it was for being the #1 tuba female player in my region -I think I was only up against one other girl!
    Congratulations to you- strange thing- I just discovered The Little Hen House YESTERDAY! She’d FUNny!

    • September 16, 2010 6:48 pm

      Hee – I thought you wrote “congratulations you strange thing”…

      This is a much more ergonomically correct contest – no heavy instruments to lift!

  7. September 16, 2010 3:31 pm

    Congrats on your award. Would you say the secret to your success is wine?

  8. September 16, 2010 6:57 pm

    I saw your post this morning and have been dying to reply and start my post to gush about how much I love your blog – if I sound like a stalker, I am really not… that much… 😉

    Thank you so much for the award, it’s a first and means so much coming from you who I consider to be a blogging genious and the reason I do more Kegel’s now – I pee my pants with laughter more often than I care to share!

    I just know there are so many good things in store for you and I can’t wait until your book gets published so I can go buy it and say, “Yeah, I know the author, she’s a blog buddy, we drink together vitually!”

    • September 16, 2010 8:23 pm

      Awww – your comments made my already-pretty-damn-fantastic day! You’re a great writer and I love the online support that we all give/receive…and if my book is ever published, we will have that drink in person!

  9. September 16, 2010 7:03 pm

    One more thing – are you all going to add the badge that I saw on Little Hen House’s Blog? Do I sound like a teenager that just asked what everyone is wearing tonight?

    • September 16, 2010 8:24 pm

      Cripes – I didn’t even see that in my acceptance frenzy…I’ll have a look, but if it’s on the blog that nominated her, I’d add it…(and don’t forget to nominate your faves to pay it forward!)

  10. September 16, 2010 7:43 pm

    Thank god you didn’t start off thanking your homeboy Jesus. I love you, your blog, your support…in no particular order. Let us toast your victory over a slab of serbian beef (not your hub) on Monday. Xx

    • September 16, 2010 8:25 pm

      Monday + Serb beef + You + Me = Heaven. Name the time and I’ll be there…

  11. Fatima permalink
    September 16, 2010 8:48 pm

    Lady… decided to put the kids to bed, soak my feet and catch up on a few too many missed blogs!

    Water is now cold (toes looking a touch blue), eyes are blurry and I feel as though I just got back from my European vacation…nicely done! And congrats on the award, it is well deserved!

    • September 16, 2010 8:59 pm

      Yay! Now we just need to get you on Facebook to see the pictures not fit for the blog 😉

      Sorry about your feet…

  12. September 16, 2010 8:54 pm

    Wow! Thank you! Such kind words. 🙂

    I so appreciate you thinking about me. So sweet.

  13. September 16, 2010 8:55 pm

    Wait, so am I just nominated or did I win? Do I have to arm wrestle the other 9 nominees? Do I have to do my disappointed-yet-excited-for-winner clap when I find out that Slightly Off Balance, won over me, and then tell all the reporters, and the talk show circuit, that it was an honor just to be nominated? Because if that’s the case….

    Just kidding! Thanks so much for the acknowledgment and for the shout out. Your blog is absolutely one of my favorites and the fact that you stayed on your game throughout your Serbian adventure is a testament to your dedication and ovarian fortitude… in other words you are one ballsy chick.

    • September 16, 2010 8:58 pm

      Omigod, my new Twitter handle is totally gonna be Ovarian Fortitude!!! You see? THAT is why you’re on the list, baby! And this award is the greatest because you win just by being nominated, so get your ass out there and pay the goodness forward!

  14. September 16, 2010 11:21 pm

    Andrea! You kill me as usual. Everytime I read your comment, I start laughing again! I would never want to go up against you or Lori in a writing competition!!!

    After my third glass of wine tonight I was thinking that someday we’re all going to have to meet at some bloggers convention or a bar, whatever! (Maybe to celebrate Lori’s book!)

    Lori – my post is up ! I also looked up Jen Lancaster’s literary agent, they are taking submittals… just sayin…

    • September 17, 2010 12:51 pm

      Love this idea!

      and yes Lori you should hit up Jen Lancaster’s agent. I have her info bookmarked, alas I have nothing to submit to her so I just hold onto it thinking ‘someday.’

      • September 18, 2010 1:17 am

        My mom (aka the nanny) will be visiting in a couple of weeks and I plan on blitzing agents with queries…eek!

  15. September 16, 2010 11:39 pm

    I love it! What company I’m in! Thank you for this, Lori. You made my day. Well, this and a large quantity of cheap chocolate and cheaper wine. But mostly this.


  16. September 17, 2010 1:45 am

    Pinot Grigio on a summer day! I’m going to add five points to your cool card. I’m so happy you accepted- you deserve it. Love all the comments. You have great readers!

    • September 18, 2010 1:24 am

      It just goes to show that our mutual crush is more than a fling…my peeps like you and vice versa…it’s one big happy toddler-poo-obsessed family…

  17. September 17, 2010 9:55 am

    Congrats – woo hoo! Well deserved. You make me laugh on mornings when I’m crying because I can’t have my caramel macchiato.

    And thanks for all the cool new sites to check out. The Little Hen House is a beautifully designed blog full of good stuff!

    • September 18, 2010 1:22 am

      Thanks, QT! I may just start drinking coffee so I can have one for you vicariously….

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