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Happy Biiiiirthday, Mr. Serrrrb

January 21, 2011

I love birthdays. If it were up to me, my birthday would be a national – or at least civic – holiday, complete with parades and fireworks (apparently I think I am my own country). I long for surprise parties and being whisked away to destinations unknown. “Go big or go home” is the approach you want to take when it comes to my birthday. Another one is “you can never have enough cheesecake.”

My husband, The Serb, hates big, attention-grabbing surprises. I’m fairly certain he would divorce me if I planned a huge party for him. I know this because he’s told me repeatedly.  Yesterday was his birthday and with the stench of his botched Father’s Day still lingering, he milked the occasion by commencing the celebrations a few days early, with variations of the following conversation:

Me:   “Dearest husband, can you please take out the garbage for me?”
Him: “It’s my birthday.”
Me:    “Oh darling, your humour is but one of my favourite things about you; however you birthday is, in fact, next week.”
Him:  “It’s my birthday weekend.”
Me:    “Of course. You’re right – let me do it and when I return I’ll give you a foot rub.”*

My fella may not want a massive birthday bash, but he still likes a big deal to be made over him, just in a smaller setting, like our kitchen. Since my inner event planner cannot be suppressed, we had a party of sorts:

There was a cake:

It was teeny because I need to get out of my muumuu and into a caftan by March Break.

And there was a kick-ass present that took three months to research, have shipped to my parents (so it didn’t arrive at our house), and keep hidden from my nosy husband kids:

This is what his fancy-pants, solar-powered, depth-measuring dive watch came in.

I was anticipating a huge reaction from him – maybe not tears, but some minor hyperventilating would’ve been nice. Alas, my thunder was stolen by the present our three-year-old daughter gave him. Something that she informed him she’d picked out and wrapped herself (about 20 minutes before he came home):

Hint: It’s a piece of her favourite Disney puzzle. How the heck was I supposed to compete with that?

The rest of the night was great: the new babysitter is fantastic; our dinner sans booster seat was delicious; and, although the Serb will deny it, once he realized his new watch automatically goes into diving mode when submerged in water, I’m pretty sure I saw a quivery lip.

* Some minor artistic license was involved in this re-enactment. Also, I may have thrown a shoe at him.

21 Comments leave one →
  1. January 21, 2011 7:49 am

    Hands down… best birthday present ever. The puzzle piece, I mean. Not the shiny silver thing. You should have put the puzzle piece IN the shiny silver container… thus enhancing their individual awesomeness.

    • January 21, 2011 7:58 am

      The puzzle piece in the shiny thing (supposed to look like a scuba tank) would’ve made the Serb’s head explode…

  2. January 21, 2011 7:51 am

    Nice cake, but I’m curious at what it would have been like with double the butter.

    I haven’t thrown a big bash in 4 years. I’m definitely due. Your daughter’s present was very thoughtful. Yup, hard to beat that.

    • January 21, 2011 7:59 am

      Ha! Double butter would’ve been impossible since I did NOT make that cake (even teeny cakes are left to the pros)…

  3. January 21, 2011 8:04 am

    I love this. Your watch is WAY cooler than the one I bought my husband at Target at the last minute before Christmas, as a filler gift. (It broke within two weeks. Ugh.) Enjoy the festivities! And protect those shoes. 🙂

    • January 21, 2011 8:28 am

      I bought a filler watch for him for Father’s Day…hence the huge f’ing watch on his b-day 😀

  4. ryoko861 permalink
    January 21, 2011 8:25 am

    LOL! Love the cake! Funny how they get smaller and smaller and smaller as we get older and older. Mine is about the size of a penny now….

    • January 21, 2011 9:46 am

      Even that tiny thing gave us leftovers. That I ate. For breakfast.

      • January 21, 2011 5:33 pm

        I like this comment. A lot.

  5. January 21, 2011 9:14 am

    the shiny thing….it looks more like a present for you…I’m just sayin……

  6. January 21, 2011 9:16 am

    Lovely, and meaningful… especially the puzzle piece. That was adorable, =) BTW, YOU MUST WATCH “A Piece of Work” -The Joan Rivers doc. You’d love it. I rented it and watched it like 5 times. God she’s great!

    • January 21, 2011 9:31 am

      Ok…I’ll watch on your recommendation. I saw her at Pearson a few years ago and am still haunted…

  7. January 21, 2011 9:24 am

    I want a puzzle piece for my birthday. Wish the Serrrb happy birthday. I was born ten days after him – same year…

    • January 21, 2011 9:31 am

      Hooray! Your shiny silver thing is in the mail (see Sara’s comment)… #youarewelcome

  8. January 21, 2011 1:56 pm

    We enjoyed your artistic license and firmly agree that birthdays should last for at least a week. That way there’s time to eat the entire cake.

    • January 21, 2011 4:15 pm

      Your invitation to my birthday party is in the mail. #welovecake

  9. January 21, 2011 4:06 pm

    The Serb gave your child life, well donated genetic material, and all his daughter gave him was a puzzle piece?

    I would be calling an adoption agency. What am I going to do with one puzzle piece. Seems to me your little angel both ruined her favorite puzzle, how can she complete it without the last pice?

    And got out of getting her Dad a decent gift.

    Maybe it is a good thing a large part of my disposable income goes to the purchase of condoms.

    Any angry comments can be directed to me here,

    Actually I think that is an incredibly sweet and thoughtful gift. What an amazing post, thank you for the smile.

    • January 21, 2011 4:15 pm

      Actually, she’s a genius – it requires his presence for her to finish said puzzle, thereby ensuring hours of puzzle-building goodness 😀

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